Apparently, all the work that's being done to improve the accessibility of cricket to the general public might be a bit too successful. There have been complaints about crowd behaviour, and the general consensus from clubs is that the Twenty20 games are attracting entirely the wrong kind of people. There's talk of professional security and increased police presence.
The MCC have also taken complaints that some people are turning up to watch test matches in casual attire and are drinking their port out of the wrong glass. Whatever next!
Thursday, 5 July 2007
The smoking ban is the work of satan
According to this vicar.
Sheesh. I mean let's be honest, I'm not exactly unbiased on this one am I? But even I see this as a bit of a stretch. Though you have to grin when you picture this outraged clergyman asking to be arrested and being told that it isn't a crime, it's an environmental health issue.
So that wouldn't be a breach of civil liberties would it vicar? Hmm. Obviously too busy huffing Myrr to find out what he's getting indignant about.
Sheesh. I mean let's be honest, I'm not exactly unbiased on this one am I? But even I see this as a bit of a stretch. Though you have to grin when you picture this outraged clergyman asking to be arrested and being told that it isn't a crime, it's an environmental health issue.
So that wouldn't be a breach of civil liberties would it vicar? Hmm. Obviously too busy huffing Myrr to find out what he's getting indignant about.
Sod off! I've been busy!
Yes, I haven't been paying enough attention to the blog of late.
No, I'm not giving up - I've just been rather hectic. So let's do a quick roundup of what's happened.
We have a new prime minister. The conservatives are complaining that he's unelected and that it's not happened for ages. So by ages you mean since JOHN MAJOR?
Parents are complaining about the inclusion of an advert about Madeline McCann in Odeon cinemas. I lost my coat a little while back, so I'm going to be writing to the head of Odeon to ask that my coat gets equal treatment.
Harry Potter film number shitloads is out. The kid who plays Hermione has said she's quitting because internet geeks are creeping her the fuck out. Can't really argue with that one.
Someone tried to blow up Glasgow. I'm not convinced that destroying what is essentially a city of violent thugs and drunks isn't 'progress' rather than 'terrorism'.
I have a new shift pattern. This means that I will be working more nights. Arse.
I've spent last weekend both surfing and snowboarding. Now that's what all weekends should be like. Well, maybe with some sex as well, but pretty cool all in all.
Facebook apparently is the new Myspace. I have to be honest, the lack of shitty emo music at every click is a good thing. As is the fact that reading profiles is 74% less likely to cause epileptic seizures.
No, I'm not giving up - I've just been rather hectic. So let's do a quick roundup of what's happened.
We have a new prime minister. The conservatives are complaining that he's unelected and that it's not happened for ages. So by ages you mean since JOHN MAJOR?
Parents are complaining about the inclusion of an advert about Madeline McCann in Odeon cinemas. I lost my coat a little while back, so I'm going to be writing to the head of Odeon to ask that my coat gets equal treatment.
Harry Potter film number shitloads is out. The kid who plays Hermione has said she's quitting because internet geeks are creeping her the fuck out. Can't really argue with that one.
Someone tried to blow up Glasgow. I'm not convinced that destroying what is essentially a city of violent thugs and drunks isn't 'progress' rather than 'terrorism'.
I have a new shift pattern. This means that I will be working more nights. Arse.
I've spent last weekend both surfing and snowboarding. Now that's what all weekends should be like. Well, maybe with some sex as well, but pretty cool all in all.
Facebook apparently is the new Myspace. I have to be honest, the lack of shitty emo music at every click is a good thing. As is the fact that reading profiles is 74% less likely to cause epileptic seizures.
Monday, 25 June 2007
Oh please don't change
Though you could also title this "my lack of surfing adventures".
So it's been nearly a month since I bought a wetsuit and declared to those of my friends unfortunate enough to be in shouting range that I was going to take up surfing. My nextdoor neighbour is a superfriendly guy called Al, and he's a very enthusiastic surfer, and very kindly was more than willing to take me along and help me get started. I was all set and ready to go.
Then the weather decided to continue in it's mission to screw with me. The waves since have either been (a) flat (b) blown out or (c) filled with deadly maneating sharks.
Ok, not C.
So I haven't been surfing. Which makes me want to surf all the more. I've been watching webcams, reading surf reports and weather forecasts almost obsessively waiting for something to happen. And now - it looks like it has. The forecast for Sunday looks good. One could even go so far as to say that it looks awesome.
So now I have to pray that it doesn't change, and that the waves arrive as promised. I also have to figure out a way to tell my sister that I would rather go surfing than go to my nephew's 3rd birthday party; which I'm sure will go down like a lead balloon. Sod it, he's only 3. It's not like he's going to remember that I wasn't there, he'll be too busy eating cake and shitting his pants.
So it's been nearly a month since I bought a wetsuit and declared to those of my friends unfortunate enough to be in shouting range that I was going to take up surfing. My nextdoor neighbour is a superfriendly guy called Al, and he's a very enthusiastic surfer, and very kindly was more than willing to take me along and help me get started. I was all set and ready to go.
Then the weather decided to continue in it's mission to screw with me. The waves since have either been (a) flat (b) blown out or (c) filled with deadly maneating sharks.
Ok, not C.
So I haven't been surfing. Which makes me want to surf all the more. I've been watching webcams, reading surf reports and weather forecasts almost obsessively waiting for something to happen. And now - it looks like it has. The forecast for Sunday looks good. One could even go so far as to say that it looks awesome.
So now I have to pray that it doesn't change, and that the waves arrive as promised. I also have to figure out a way to tell my sister that I would rather go surfing than go to my nephew's 3rd birthday party; which I'm sure will go down like a lead balloon. Sod it, he's only 3. It's not like he's going to remember that I wasn't there, he'll be too busy eating cake and shitting his pants.
Oh look, Henmania's back
Today marks the start of the wimbledon tennis tournament. Which explains why it was absolutely pissing it down as I biked into work today. All the back pages are carrying news of the terrible tragedy that Andy Murray won't be playing because his wrist has fallen off.
So now we have a fortnight of crappy weather to look forward to. Hopefully, it'll bring along some decent surf with it as I am dying to get out into the Bristol channel and spend a few hours dunking myself into the murky waters.
So now we have a fortnight of crappy weather to look forward to. Hopefully, it'll bring along some decent surf with it as I am dying to get out into the Bristol channel and spend a few hours dunking myself into the murky waters.
Wednesday, 20 June 2007
Being sinister
Yep, that's me.
It's an interesting thing being left handed. According to the internet, somewhere between 10 & 15% of the world share this affliction with me, and something happened that sparked me thinking about this, so now I'm going to share those thoughts with you.
Part of the reason why being a leftie can be so frustrating is that your brain is wired a bit differently. This means that some things which are natural for a right handed person are the wrong way round for me. A good example is joined up writing. When I was taught this, I followed all the instructions carefully, and was surprised to find that my writing was backwards. I was even more surprised when I found out that this isn't unusual, and that the teaching material for cursive writing will always mean that a left hander will produce mirror writing.
Eventually of course, I figured out how to write the right way round (what a handist term that is!) , and I was able to become a functioning member of society. Now, if it surprises you that schools teach a method of writing at which some kids are bound to struggle at, then some of what follows may shock you to the very core...
When my father was at school, he wasn't allowed to use his left hand for writing. He was forced by teachers to use his other hand, and had ambidexterity forced upon him. From his recollection, he hated it and tried to sneakily use his left. Seeing as he was raised in the dark ages, the teachers had no hesitation in beating him up for not using the proper hand and he was often clubbed around the face with a morning star flail until he put the crayon back in his right hand.
Historically though, left handers have always been treated poorly. In the middle ages, left handedness was seen as a sign of satanic influence (so was usually enough to get the witch hunter looking at you funny); even the word sinister comes from latin for left (sinistrus).
Then there's the problems with scissors, rulers, mice, guitars, can openers and all kinds of other day to day paraphenalia that just aren't designed with left handers in mind. Until you've spent hours as a child being unable to cut pits of coloured paper neatly for a collage, then you've no idea what true frustration is.
But I'm not pretending that there aren't advantages to being left handed. I can write backwards with surprising ease, and apparently left handed people are more likely to be of a genius level intellect (Gabe will comment on this blog that I'm the exception to prove the rule, but he loves me for my thinking really).
Now, the thing that got me started with all this is down to the root cause of left handedness - that my brain is wired backwards. One continuing problem I have is that according to my brain, clocks should be the other way around. I suppose the best way of thinking of it is that for me, clockwise and anticlockwise should be swapped over. This can sometimes be a problem when I glance at my watch to check the time (no, I don't wear a casio calculator watch). Imagine my excitement a little while back when I realised it was a quarter to two, which meant I only had another hour and a bit to go at work. Now imagine the crushing of my spirit that took place when I realised that I am a backward brained moron and it was only 10.15.
Sometimes being left handed is poo.
It's an interesting thing being left handed. According to the internet, somewhere between 10 & 15% of the world share this affliction with me, and something happened that sparked me thinking about this, so now I'm going to share those thoughts with you.
Part of the reason why being a leftie can be so frustrating is that your brain is wired a bit differently. This means that some things which are natural for a right handed person are the wrong way round for me. A good example is joined up writing. When I was taught this, I followed all the instructions carefully, and was surprised to find that my writing was backwards. I was even more surprised when I found out that this isn't unusual, and that the teaching material for cursive writing will always mean that a left hander will produce mirror writing.
Eventually of course, I figured out how to write the right way round (what a handist term that is!) , and I was able to become a functioning member of society. Now, if it surprises you that schools teach a method of writing at which some kids are bound to struggle at, then some of what follows may shock you to the very core...
When my father was at school, he wasn't allowed to use his left hand for writing. He was forced by teachers to use his other hand, and had ambidexterity forced upon him. From his recollection, he hated it and tried to sneakily use his left. Seeing as he was raised in the dark ages, the teachers had no hesitation in beating him up for not using the proper hand and he was often clubbed around the face with a morning star flail until he put the crayon back in his right hand.
Historically though, left handers have always been treated poorly. In the middle ages, left handedness was seen as a sign of satanic influence (so was usually enough to get the witch hunter looking at you funny); even the word sinister comes from latin for left (sinistrus).
Then there's the problems with scissors, rulers, mice, guitars, can openers and all kinds of other day to day paraphenalia that just aren't designed with left handers in mind. Until you've spent hours as a child being unable to cut pits of coloured paper neatly for a collage, then you've no idea what true frustration is.
But I'm not pretending that there aren't advantages to being left handed. I can write backwards with surprising ease, and apparently left handed people are more likely to be of a genius level intellect (Gabe will comment on this blog that I'm the exception to prove the rule, but he loves me for my thinking really).
Now, the thing that got me started with all this is down to the root cause of left handedness - that my brain is wired backwards. One continuing problem I have is that according to my brain, clocks should be the other way around. I suppose the best way of thinking of it is that for me, clockwise and anticlockwise should be swapped over. This can sometimes be a problem when I glance at my watch to check the time (no, I don't wear a casio calculator watch). Imagine my excitement a little while back when I realised it was a quarter to two, which meant I only had another hour and a bit to go at work. Now imagine the crushing of my spirit that took place when I realised that I am a backward brained moron and it was only 10.15.
Sometimes being left handed is poo.
Tuesday, 19 June 2007
My name's Joe, and I'm the fastest blog alive
Or something like that.
For those of you who have no idea what that's a reference to, it's a comicbook character called "The Flash" (it's in italics because it's moving quickly).
The Flash is one of DC's longest running superheroes, and there's been a Flash in some form or another through most of comicbook history. Unlike characters like Spiderman or Batman though, the mantle of the Flash has been passed on to younger characters a few times as the book has gone on.
I won't bore you with all the details (you can find them quite easily on Wikipedia) but I will say that I was a huge fan of Wally West. The writing on the book was good, there was a more lighthearted feel to the book and it was just good old fashioned superheroistic fun.
Then came the reboot. A year ago, Flash got a new title, a new issue number 1, and the mantle was passed on to Bart Allen. I was a bit miffed, but I'm a big boy these days, and I was prepared to give it a chance. Unfortunately, they also changed the writer. They changed from a good writer, to a bad writer. Danny Bilson should have been good. He wrote the Flash TV Series, which though hampered by dodgy special effects and cheesy acting was a fun series to watch. So I wasn't expecting the writing to be bad. But it was. I lasted 4 issues before I couldn't face it any more, and I went into mourning for a character that I'd enjoyed and was now dead to me.
So today comes the good news. Not only is Bilson off the job, but he's being replaced by Mark Waid - a writer who was responsible for one of the best runs on the Flash ever. Not only are they getting rid of the new title, but they're even going back to the old title and continuing the numbering as if the shitty new title never existed. But best of all is this - Wally's coming back. With his corny jokes, his laid back easygoingness that no-one else in the DCU seems to have and with his ability to be a superhero that isn't screaming about angst all the damn time.
And that's a flash fact.
For those of you who have no idea what that's a reference to, it's a comicbook character called "The Flash" (it's in italics because it's moving quickly).
The Flash is one of DC's longest running superheroes, and there's been a Flash in some form or another through most of comicbook history. Unlike characters like Spiderman or Batman though, the mantle of the Flash has been passed on to younger characters a few times as the book has gone on.
I won't bore you with all the details (you can find them quite easily on Wikipedia) but I will say that I was a huge fan of Wally West. The writing on the book was good, there was a more lighthearted feel to the book and it was just good old fashioned superheroistic fun.
Then came the reboot. A year ago, Flash got a new title, a new issue number 1, and the mantle was passed on to Bart Allen. I was a bit miffed, but I'm a big boy these days, and I was prepared to give it a chance. Unfortunately, they also changed the writer. They changed from a good writer, to a bad writer. Danny Bilson should have been good. He wrote the Flash TV Series, which though hampered by dodgy special effects and cheesy acting was a fun series to watch. So I wasn't expecting the writing to be bad. But it was. I lasted 4 issues before I couldn't face it any more, and I went into mourning for a character that I'd enjoyed and was now dead to me.
So today comes the good news. Not only is Bilson off the job, but he's being replaced by Mark Waid - a writer who was responsible for one of the best runs on the Flash ever. Not only are they getting rid of the new title, but they're even going back to the old title and continuing the numbering as if the shitty new title never existed. But best of all is this - Wally's coming back. With his corny jokes, his laid back easygoingness that no-one else in the DCU seems to have and with his ability to be a superhero that isn't screaming about angst all the damn time.
And that's a flash fact.
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